The responsibility to quench thirst by providing drinks when a relative is dying spouses’ experience in specialist palliative home care

BACKGROUND: Thirst and dry mouth are common symptoms in terminally ill patients. It is known that family members usually request drips for their dying relative. Few studies have focused on thirst in terminally ill patients and their spouses’ experience of this, leading to a knowledge gap in this area. AIM: The aim of this study was to explore spouses’ experiences of observing and managing thirst in a dying relative admitted to specialist palliative home care. METHODS: A qualitative interview study with an inductive approach was conducted. Eighteen spouses caring for their husband or wife admitted to specialist palliative home care in different hospitals in Sweden were interviewed. The interviews were transcribed verbatim and analysed with a reflexive thematic analysis. RESULTS: Three main themes emerged regarding spouses’ experiences of patients’ thirst: Knowledge and views of thirst; Control of fluid intake provides vital information; and Taking charge of their drinking is a life and death responsibility. CONCLUSIONS: Spouses experience a responsibility to serve the dying person with fluids so that they will not get thirsty. It is so obvious and commonplace to them. To be able to fulfil this responsibility, they need to keep track of the patient’s fluid intake and know what quenches thirst. There is a need for research in this area to assist carers and patients in identifying which drinks best quench the patient’s thirst. Interventions are also needed to help provide/make available knowledge on suitable thirst-quenching drinks. SUPPLEMENTARY INFORMATION: The online version contains supplementary material available at 10.1186/s12904-023-01306-1.