“I’m walking on eggshells”: challenges faced by mothers with breast cancer in interacting with adolescent daughters

BACKGROUND: With breast cancer becoming the most diagnosed cancer in the world, the number of breast cancer-afflicted mothers with adolescent daughters is also rising. Further, adolescent daughters’ mothers serve as role models for in identity formation processes, especially concerning gender and sexuality. Nevertheless, breast cancer threats mother’s health, including such a key symbol of her womanhood—the breast—which may adversely affect the development of an adolescent daughter’s own sense of personal identity and womanhood. However, few researchers and practitioners have paid attention to mother-daughter interactions in the context of breast cancer. Therefore, this study aimed to uncover the nuances of the interactive challenges with adolescent daughters from breast cancer-afflicted mothers’ perspective. METHODS: We conducted a qualitative study following the sample saturation principle, collecting data through semi-structured interviews with 21 breast cancer patients who met the inclusion criteria. We utilized thematic analysis and partially integrated the Foucauldian discourse approach to analyze the data. RESULTS: Three major themes emerged from the data: (1) mothers are lost in chaos (inability to handle the shock of cancer, feelings of powerlessness about the uncertainty of their life span, and confusion about how to respond to daughter’s curiosity); (2) mothers struggle to maintain balance (torn between protecting daughters and letting them be independent, and making a tough choice between being a mother or a patient); and (3) mothers are immersed in guilt (increasing daughters’ risk of cancer, influencing daughters’ development, and imposing burdens on daughters). CONCLUSIONS: Our research explored the interactive experience of breast cancer-afflicted mothers and adolescent daughters. The insights uncovered by this study will help mothers enhance interaction with their daughters and assist health practitioners in devising interventions. SUPPLEMENTARY INFORMATION: The online version contains supplementary material available at 10.1186/s12905-022-01872-1.